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Soapbox: Locals are a cause for concern
by Rachel Broady9/ 6/2005
CORONATION STREET Eeh, our Shelley's gone all
agoraphobic. There's a market trader somewhere who'll lose his
stall if she's not out buying her tops soon! She attempts to face
the Rovers punters but only makes it as far as the stairs before
she has a panic attack. Why? Is Cilla in there with her horror
tan?
Tracy is equally concerned about the pub's clientèle when she sees
Steve chatting with that woman he met in the park. Steve confides
in his mum that he regrets getting it together with Tracy but his
girlfriend is trying to rent number six for them - meaning Danny
and family will be out on their ears.
Sally's working at t'factory and doesn't take well to the girls'
constant jibes and practical jokes. You think now Rosie is a veggie
Goth that Sally would laugh at owt. Janice tells Sally that Adam
has left her in charge and Sally's ego expands as far as Rosamund
Street. Danny is none too pleased and the dressing down he gives
her is funnier than seeing Shelley having a wobbly on the
cobbles.
EMMERDALE VE Day has a different meaning in the
village when celebrations are used as a cover to get people to
Pollard's birthday do. Vacuous Eric? Viv's Excruciating? Val's
Everyone's?
Meanwhile, the boring businessman is getting excited about living
with Val and her fishnet stockings as well as the pair setting up a
soft furnishings company together.
Well, she does look like a sofa that needs restuffing in some of
her outfits.
Debbie shows her and Andy's baby to the villagers and no one runs
away screaming.
Matthew is playing a dangerous game when he arranges to meet Terry
for lunch but stands him up to bed his girlfriend.
Zoë invites Scott to join her overseas.
Oh, please, please go away with your irritating phoney accent
Scott.
And take your sister with you. California deserves you.
EASTENDERS Dot has pulled that bloke from It Ain't
Half Hot Mum but is too naïve to realise.
He organises a proper posh picnic and tells her how he feels.
She's very shocked but doesn't drop her fag.
Zoë is leaving and who can blame her? Her mum wants back with Alfie
and her sister wants back with Billy and the storylines are
repeating so much I wouldn't be surprised if they brought back Phil
Mitchell for five minutes and then Dirty Den and Cindy Beale back
from the dead.
Oh, hang on ...
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