my daughter is buried at dukinfield cemetery and i don't think the mothers or fathers have gone overboard have councillors ever lost a child, do they really know what it feels like councils complain when we put things on the graves but won't help us protect the graves from vandals cemetery form any further comments feel free to email me from mike - mike_shepley@hotmail.com

   Maybe my comments were a litle insensitive, and I'm truly sorry for your loss, it's just that I do not understand why graveyards have suddenly started to change, why it wasn't enough for people to treat graves as they always have done? I do not object to teddy bears but when it comes to lights etc, well it just puzzles me.

   to sb from audenshaw, i find your comments appaling, have you lost a child? Do you know what it feels like to have to say night night to your child in a cemetry, no-one competes for who has the best grave, i certainly do not. My sons grave is colourful just like he was when he was alive. Its not mine or my childs fault that he got cancer and died at the age of 5. i have plenty of solar lights on his grave so that he is not in the dark as when he was at home we always had the light on for him as he was scared of the dark.I totally agree with the council about the wrought iron railings which are dangerous, they are just trying to protect people and children from getting seriously injured or even killed.Please comments like that hurt.

   In responce to the mother of 2 little darlings, your comment was perfectly put together. My heart goes out to all parents that have lost a child, let these people find comfort in these small items .........

   Your child or relatives last resting place is all that you have left. I find it heartless that people can begrude a teddy bear on a grave. I fully understand health and safety issues and respect that spiked railings could be a danger and should not be allowed if it poses a risk. I wish people could be more compasionate. Perhaps they will understand when they lose someone close to them. To leave a light on for a child in the dark gives them comfort; perhaps the comfort goes to those grieving to leave a light on in the cemetery. If the council lit the cemetry people may not feel the need for additional lights.

   sb I don't think that people are competing to have the most elaberate graves. I class myslef very luckly not to have lost a child and with an ounce of compation I can understand some of the tribute's they place on the childrens graves. OK so some are over the top and maybe they should tone them down a touch but I can't see a problem with a solar light or a teddy. Those who have had children will know that they like a light on a night, this is probably where the lanterns/solar lights come in and as for teddies all children have these. My mother in law's grave was vandalised in a North Manchester graveyard last year. All the flowers left for her were thrown over a high brick wall with the vases and the grannete stone with her inscription on (that was cemented to the ground) was also removed and had the same fate yet I don't know how they managed it. This is something to complain about yet my family didn't they just went and collected the items from the comercial yard they had been thrown into and we got on with it. Ok so some local residents think it's a bit scary looking in the dark with the lights glowing but they knew they were going to be living next to a graveyard when they moved into their homes. I have more sympathy for those who have lost children than those who think its a bit scary looking at night. Let these people greve in peace.

   I agree with this wholeheartedly. Graveyards should be solemn places, not places for people to compete for who has the most elaborate and eye catching paraphenalia.